Dear Kaitlin, 

I am sure you get asked this question a lot, but how did you become so successful in such a short amount of time? Everyone around me is being featured, has over 15 weddings booked, has a studio….the list goes on. I am averaging about a shoot every week and only have 7 weddings on the books. I want to be more successful but I dont know what to do or what goals I should set for myself to BECOME “successful”. Guidance please?

Success is defined as”the attainment of wealth, position, honors, or the like”. And when I looked up the synonyms for the word success, three words came up: Achievement, Fame and Triumph.

It would appear as though success is based on status, money, and overall bragging rights. Right!??!

What an egotistical place of thought we have attached to success. As a society we have made fame, money and the amount of awards we obtain as the defining factors in whether or not we are a “somebody” or not.

Sure, money is great. Fame is flattering. Awards are AMAZING. But success is subjective my love. Success to one is NOT success to the other.

 

Success to my grandmother is watching her healthy grandchildren grow and flourish and smile when she visits. Success in the simple gift she has been given with another day to be on this Earth.

Success to husband is when he knows that he saved a life a work, not the award he may receive for it.

Success to my girlfriend is getting as many stamps in her passport before 30 and knowing that she can dance anytime she wants to. (That girl LOVES to dance!)

Success to ME is having a business that can give back to others, as others have helped me along the way. Success is being able to send my children to one of the best schools around and know they are being taught the values I want them to be taught. Success to me is staying an extra hour at a wedding or a shoot because its not about the time or money, its about making sure the couple/family get as many precious moments captured as possible.

Success is subjective. After a bit of of digging I found this document that I personally believe is very telling of the things successful people do often have in common:

 

It is FANTASTIC to be featured and I will never belittle that accomplishment of others or myself. Making money is important. We all have loved ones to support, take care of, etc. But love, I promise you that success is not defined by being the “best of the best”, “richest of the rich”, “most famous of the group.” Success is what youuuu make. If you achieve one goal or “to do list item” each day….GIRL….you are successful. You wouldnt believe the success I had between the washer, sink full of dishes and dirty floors. Yesterday…for as busy and tired as I was…I WAS THE MOST SUCCESSFUL PERSON IN THE WORLD in my eyes. I allowed myself to take pride in even the smallest of accomplishments. The most simple and boring of tasks. But I did it! I made a small difference in my own way and on my own terms.

DO NOT LIVE YOUR LIFE BASED ON SOMEONE ELSES DREAMS AND GOALS. THEIR SUCCESS WILL BE YOUR FAILURES.

Why? Because you have already failed if you are trying to live someone else’s life. So what if they have 15 weddings and you have 7. 7 IS A GREAT NUMBER! So what if they are swamped every week? Think of all the time you have to spend bettering your business and self. Spending it with your family. Overly busy is not always equal to success. I know that may be hard to understand and hard for me to even say….because there are some days I am too busy to even breathe. Like literally I stop and grab my forehead like “WHY AM I KILLING MYSELF…WHAT IS THE POINT….WHAT IS MY GOAL HERE?” It is then….and only then, that I realize my self inflicted pressures are based on anothers level of success. Trying to surpass it, equal it, better it. I am failing.

 

But when I am as busy as I know I can handle, my family can handle and my life outside of photography can handle…and things are done at MY PACE and not anthers, SUCCESS IS FOREVER ABUNDANT.

Remember this, ” YOU CAN NEVER FAIL AT BEING YOU….BUT YOU WILL ALWAYS FAIL AT TRYING TO BE SOMEONE YOUR NOT”!

Here is to finding your own level, definition, and synonyms for success. Each and everyday….you are here…alive…breathing….and loved. Right there love, you are a BEAMING SUCCESS!

 

XOXOXO,

Kaitlin Noel