5 Lessons Learned in 5 Years (almost : P ):

1. Copying and mimicking will be the death of you and your business….so just be you!

There was once upon a time I hung on the words of the greats. I copied their every move and tried to make the same movements in business at the same time they were…just to feel like I was keeping up. But what I didn’t know, is by doing that, I was only pushing myself back more. I was SO FOCUSED on doing things JUST LIKE THEM….do everything they say will make you more successful….but I did it all in one day….and I did it ONLY their way. I didn’t take into account that these people weren’t parents, they were in business nearly 3+ years longer, they had more than one camera and one 50mm lens…..they had more experience, knowledge and know how because they invested in such. I simply tried to skip over those essential growing pains and soar “right to the top.”

I failed.

Instead of taking what they said and using it as inspiration….inspiration to find my own way…try out things that worked for me…my family, my situation, my life…I copied. Over time I learned that THE ONLY way to get ahead is to STOP trying to be like everyone else. Don’t do what they are doing because that will stunt a growth in you that NEEDS to happen free of influence. It needs to happen because of YOU and only you. Just over a year ago I made a decision. A risky one. I decided to rebrand.

Truth: My time with Katelyn James DID inspire me to make that step….but it did not guide my every move/decision. Rebranding once is hard….but I rebranded nearly 3 times in 4 years….and thats INSANELY HARD. Its hard to keep followers and fans when you appear to be lost and not even know who you are or where you want to go. Lucky for me I built a business based on friendships and love before money and business deals…and my clients/fans stood by me. SURE I lost some along the way…but the “true blues” as I call them, stayed. And now…with a successful rebrand under my belt to be 100% me….I weirdly find myself now looking at others copying me and not looking at them so much with anger….but just sadness….because I KNOW where that leads. Failure. Hopefully though, out of their failure, they will see that being themselves will be their only hopes at their own COMEBACK. When you are a business owner you are always learning new things. For example, it was only recently that I realized how important having effective phone solutions similar to those found at https://www.eatelbusiness.com/phone-solutions really is.

I have those that are copying my logo….the colors/textures of my site, using the word EXCLUSIVE before everything….stealing whole paragraphs from my site even with my business name STILL IN the paragraph or even copying my exact wedding collections….BUT, it will get them no where. Start from a blank page….don’t even ask another photographer how they set up their collections…what font they used on their site. YOU OFFER…YOU DO…YOU SHOW WHAT YOU WANT….YOU BE EXACTLY WHO YOU ARE….AND NOTHING ELSE EVER! You will spend your whole business wondering why what worked for someone else will NEVER work for you and thats NO way to live or run a business…at least a happy or successful one.

2. Put yourself out there…like REALLY out there. One step outside of your comfort zone may be all you need!

I think a lot of people are afraid to be uncomfortable. I think that they are scared to be that vulnerable. Though I used to be one of them…it never got me anywhere thinking that if I just keep my head low and do the same thing, eventually I will grow…climb ever so slowly to the “top”….whatever that meant. But here is the cold hard truth….NO ONE gets anywhere by doing the same mundane thing over and over. NO one gets anywhere when they are comfortable….and you certainly do not learn anything, teach others anything, or improve anything if you do not at least try something new.

Life and business are two fast paced entities. We do not have “forever”…we do not have infinite amounts of time to just skirt by. You are given this precious gift of life not to sit in someones shadows…not to just do what you are comfy doing. You are here to push your own limits. Scare yourself a bit…put yourself out there even if that means you have to fall, fail, or pick yourself back up. It makes you smarter, stronger, and more capable. BUSINESS is HARD. Its not always a stop and smell the roses adventure. Its a hustle…a never ending one. You have limited windows of opportunity to let someone know who you are, what you want and what or how you can not only make their day better, but life around them better. Be a go-getter and invite a photographer you admire to coffee, your treat. Offer to meet up and take new images of them, for FREE. Offer yourself up as an assistant/second shooter…send them a hand written card to let them know they have made an impact on you…walk across that room, tell them your name, give them a hug and look them in the eyes…I bet you will see that those whom you fear to talk to….those moments that leave pits in your stomach, they are the most worth it and life changing.

3. Make time and prioritize your life and business so they are in balance with each other-

People call me wonderwoman. Its the sweetest compliment, but it really couldn’t be farther from the truth. I am a wife of a police officer whom has the WORST schedule ever, a mother of 2 boys under 4, a full time small business owner with over 30 couples and over 100 families I shoot almost every year, a friend to girls that leave all over the east coast, and a family member to an insanely awesome family. I some how have to make equal time for ALL of these people….INCLUDING personal time for myself. ITS A LOT TO JUGGLE. In the beginning…it was all work…no play. It was the hustle. It was the, I have to do whatever I have to do to get that phone to ring. It was a all nighter 3 times a week thing. It was a work 3 small jobs to afford money for gear. But guess what it became because of that…..missing my kids do things for the first time. My relationship with my husband strained to the max as we were ships in the passing night. My family would go at least a month without hearing from me and they would then call my husband and say ,”is Kait alive?”. HOW AWFUL!

It honestly wasn’t until this past year that I began to open my eyes to all that I was missing while trying to have a life around my business. That was my problem. I needed to build a business around my life. My whole world is my family…my little ones, my hubby, my friends. BUT I knew I also needed to work to be able to afford to support my children, feed them, cloth them. Times were hard at first. REALLY hard. If you ever hear me speak about my story, you will hear that I started this business with $4.32 in my account. So, though I am at a great place today, to much was sacrificed to get here…and there would have been a better way if I learned to balance my time. Luckily thought here are certain parts of my business like my website that I have been able to deal with because of businesses that offer Business IT solutions when my websites not up and running for some reason, they are great as I am actually able to spend time with my family or for myself whilst they resolve the issue and get my website up and running again.

So, now: I schedule myself 1 day off a week….SURE I will check my email….but as far as editing, constant social media updates, blogging…..NOPE…I take a break from it all. Unplug if you will. Its reenergizing and it gives me the time to enjoy my kids and everything/one I work so hard for. Don’t put all your eggs in one basket. Take time to breath, it actually promotes MORE creativity and leads to success long term. I know it seems like you have to work twice as hard to get your name out there, to market yourself, to get those clients….but I promise you, you will get burnt out…lose the respect of those around you, and fail in a way you may not be able to recover from. Treasure those relationships around you and build your business around those people, not the other way around!

4. NOT everyone will like you. No matter what you do you may not be able to change someone and their negative thoughts/impact on your life. DO NOT waste the time and energy it takes to try. Let it and them go and rise above.

We all know this one right!? The haters….the jealous types. The ones that have NOTHING better to do that wait for an opportunity to tear you down, make fun of you, pull on those ever so fragile heart strings in hopes of deterring you for even a second? Man oh man….I wish I could go back and SMACK myself across the face for letting one tear fall because of those people. For wasting one second of my life reading those comments….analyzing them….and letting them infect me.

PLEASE do yourself a favor and think of it this way: THOSE PEOPLE…the inherently evil ones that appear to have had no mother or the worst one of all that never taught them the GOLDEN RULE…..they are SERIOUSLY killing themselves and their own business by worrying about you and yours. The time it takes them to look at your image, share it with others, blog it, make fun of it….call you out publicly, comment on it to tear you down with heartless words….ALL OF THAT TAKES TIME THEY COULD BE SPENDING IMPROVING THEIR BUSINESS….AND WASTING IT ON TRYING TO TEAR DOWN YOURS!

Love this quote from MM!

The best part is watching those evil people say how busy they are…but if they were that busy….how do they even have time to worry about you!?!? How empty are they inside that they waste their gift of life trying to bring down yours?! Its quite sad….so instead lets all say a prayer for those people. They MUST be going through something really rough to think that their ignorant comments are some how going to affect yours business or you.

People are NOT blind or stupid. Remain classy, never respond. Never retaliate. While they are busy running their mouths about you and you are saying nothing but keeping on keeping on in your business and life…..people will see who the REAL drama starters are. The ones that rather tear you down than improve their business…and those clients WILL leave them for you…or someone else. I know this for a fact, trust me on this one! : )

So plaster that smile back on your face, and from this moment on NEVER ever let them or anyone in the future every deter you from your goals and dreams. It will be your biggest regret letting the face of evil win!

5. Serve others before serving yourself. Be thankful and grateful. And try to remember why you chose to be a photographer in the first place (if you answer is to get rich fast…you are in the WRONG line of work my friend)-

It is so easy to get caught up in this industry. Its easy to always find yourself wanting more….”If I just had this…I would be good. Once I get that lens…..Ill be done……if I go to that conference, I wont need that other one….” Its so easy to forget to stop and look at WHAT YOU DO HAVE and what you HAVE ACCOMPLISHED and just focus on how much left there is to get or do. Photography is a journey. Not a destination. Its a subjective art form that thrives on hard work, originality and passion. NO one got to where they are in life or in business alone. Be sure to stop and thank those that had a part in getting to where you are. Stop and appreciate what you do have by simply enjoying it….taking advantage of what you have become or made for yourself. I have been battling with “should I or shouldn’t I host workshops/mentoring sessions” for about a year. I went through the “am I telling to much, giving away my secrets….etc.” What I learned is that there are NO SECRETS. I am most likely NOT the first to do what I am doing or the last. I don’t own any one idea or pose. ITS ME that makes it unique…not the camera, location, outfit or pose. I have even had people attend my workshops, then my competitors and no doubt shared everything I did with them. But hey….that is ok. Its flattering. Frustrating sure, but flattering in the end. Why you ask? Because when I see those competitors put into action what I am doing, they must see me as a success, otherwise they wouldn’t copy me. So while on line they may say Im a joke….they are out there copying what I am doing hoping it will bring them the same success it has brought me. Again…it may work for the short term…but while they are busy trying to copy me/ be me…I have already moved on to something bigger and better HOPING and praying that they find something thats unique to them. So again guys, dont get caught up in wanting more…wanting to be something or have something you dont. Appreciate the here and now….these moments are shaping you. God has a great plan for all of us…I can assure you that! BE THANKFUL AND GRATEFUL….not greedy or deserving. Remember, that we all fail a LOT more than we succeed….and that is what shapes someones TRUE character.

I hope you enjoyed my lessons learned….nothing too profound….but all serve as a great reminder to my own self….how far I have come from that girl in hot pink and ringlet blonde curls. Thank you to everyone that got me to where I am today….I certainly didn’t do it alone!

xoxo, Kaitlin Noel